Tuesday, April 07, 2009

The Abridged Whittled-Down Haggadah

Have you seen Michael Rubiner's The Two-Minute Haggadah, the Passover service for the impatient?

Starts off with

Opening prayers:
Thanks, God, for creating wine. (Drink wine.)
Thanks for creating produce. (Eat parsley.)

Overview: Once we were slaves in Egypt. Now we're free. That's why we're doing this.

Four questions:
1. What's up with the matzoh?
2. What's the deal with horseradish?
3. What's with the dipping of the herbs?
4. What's this whole slouching at the table business?

Answers:
1. When we left Egypt, we were in a hurry. There was no time for making decent bread.
2. Life was bitter, like horseradish.
3. It's called symbolism.
4. Free people get to slouch.


And goes on from there.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

One photo of yourself on your blog would suffice to show you're not hiding or disguising yourself. But four (4) photos of yourself on your home-page says you're a narcissist. You're major creepy.